Hi-Brow + Low-Brow = Uni-Brow

Do you know this term?

It's basically just like all that shit you forward to your friends but the ones that have a product attached to them ... even if you think it was "rejected" idea from the ad agency or whatever the con is ...

Anyhoo, my company - Globo-Proo has taken Viral Marketing to the next level.

What's left of my staff and I "procured" a small sample of the smallpox dna and constructed it so that the tell-tale "pox" do not appear on the skin until the actual moment of death and when they do, they spell out the words DRINK COKE

Or rather, they should.

Right now the floor of my office is littered with dead temps whose bleeding pustules spell out the words DRINK COLE

I wish there was a product called COLE. That would give some meaning to this endeavor (as well as cover some of my costs - try breaking into CDC hot zone level five, it takes some doing)

...

We'll see how that .mil spybot likes all those hotbutton words. Some poor analyst is gonna have to read this thing. NSA and NRO analysts know where all the good porn is.

I'm turning 40 in a matter of days and I've already finished up my Mid-Life Crisis.

It happened two weeks ago.

I was reading this theatre book, fascinating stuff. Never really occurred to me that there was a difference between Naturalism and Realism and if there was, it was strictly for egghead academics and of no use to us in the field.

Further complicating the issue is that some of these ISMs mean slightly or radically different things depending on if you're talking about painting or theatre or other arts.

Suddenly it hit me -- this overwhelming anxiety -- I have, for decades now, labored as a good Absurdist when this damn book comes along and makes me start to doubt.

Maybe I'm not an Absurdist, what if I'm actually a Surrealist?

(remember the meaning is slightly different than the painterly version)

After a couple days of angst (I'm sure it was angst) I went to my pal Sue Who Is A College Professor and asked her outright "Am I an Absurdist or a Surre-" "Absurdist!" She didn't even let me fimish.

She said Surrealists (and keep in mind she's a film professor, not theatre or painting) are influenced by Freudian dream interpretation and use dream imagery in their work to create bold and startling visual statements.

"Ok, so what's an Absurdist?"

"You."


Whew.

Karen was relieved to hear that my mid life crisis did not involve a sports car or a cocktail waitress.

Ya know what sucks about losing weight?

I mean other than not eating piles of yummy goodness.

I've noticed that since I've lost a little weight, some people at work are treating me a little better.

Fuck that and fuck them.

Gimme them Cheetohs and some fudge!

Ya know ...

I wish the Fundamentalists of all religions would just head out to the desert and slug it out and leave the rest of us out of it.

I don't believe in Allah, I don't think that dumb-ass rapture thing is coming and I don't own an oil company. I couldn't give two shits about any of it, so why do we all have to be in the way when these clowns throw bombs at each other?

I'd love it if that rapture thing came though. I would love to be LEFT BEHIND or as I think of it LEFT ALONE ... fine, get out of here and let us start cleaning up the environment, heal diseases with stem cells, curb population growth and STDS with contraception and sex education. Teach children actual science rather than fairy tales from moldy books.

Man, THAT would be heaven.

(I'm too tired to put in the usual "I realize not all religious people blah blah blah")

There comes a point where you have to wonder ... if you think your religious book says the world will end AND it's very important to you that it everything in that book be true ... how far are you willing to go to MAKE SURE the world goes up in flames?

Are you doing God's Will to light the fuse that blows up the world?

Are these the beliefs and actions of a healthy person?

I've been saying it privately, I'll say it publicly -- planet wide, religious people are becoming a real problem and we should, at the very least, not give them guns ...

oh and electing oilmen is probably not good for either the environment OR our national security ...

I was in a sketch group called Mental Furniture for about 8 years. Tom Carrozza put a little snippet of our work on his web site. Have a look ...

http://www.tomcarrozza.com/mentalF/mentalF.html